Dating your spouse


    Bring on the roses, red wine and dinner reservations... February 14th is the most romantic day of the year.

    However, dating your spouse shouldn't be limited to Valentine's Day.

    Lisa and Kevin Holmes are taking the night off from their parenting responsibilities, and instead, reconnecting at a couple's art class.

    Even though it sometimes takes those little reminders, the Holmes' say they always make it a point to spend time alone. One night a month is reserved for dates.

    "It's huge, it's amazing," the Holmes said. "It's really great to have a one on one, and to do new things and experience fun things. It really makes a difference in our relationships. Talking about your goals, just having that adult time."

    It sounds simple, but relationship experts say when kids come into the picture, that effort is often lost in day-to-day family life.

    "Everybody has heard that marriages take work," Independent marriage and family therapist Melissa Strombeck said. "I try to explain it, it's kind of like a plant. If you want a plant to grow. You can't neglect it. Over time it will whither and it will die."

    Strombeck says a lot of times there's an assumption that the marriage is stable and everyone sort-of goes into auto pilot. And if you're not careful, she says even date nights can get routine, going to dinner and talking about kids and finances.

    "I encourage people go out and do something different," Strombeck said. "Do something neither one of you have done before because that creates an opportunity to bond and to learn a new thing about your partner that maybe you didn't know before."

    That advice has helped get the Holmes' through 25 years of marriage and counting.

    "We thought it would be fun to paint a picture together and then we can crack on each other and see which one is the best. Have our kids vote who is the artist in the family." The Holmes said.

    But, despite what ends up on the canvas, they agree their greatest masterpiece is the life they've created together.

    "Everything will be okay as long as you two are okay. And if you waited for your kids to go out on a date night, you waited too long."

    Experts say a lot of times, couples wait too long to seek help. So, if you're relationship is in a rut, talk to friends and relatives, read reviews and find a counselor your both comfortable with.

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